Hello everyone and welcome back to Cinematic Disasters. The segment where I review terrible movies and this time were looking at Ballistic: Eck vs. Sever.
Ballistic: Eck vs. Sever is a 2002 action-thriller movie. The film was produced by Franchise Pictures and distributed by Warner Bros. Pictures. Ballistic is written by Alan B. McElroy and directed by Wych Kaosayananda (under the pseudonym "Kaos").
The story is FBI Agent Jeremiah Ecks has been brought back to the force to help find Agent Sever. While on this mission Ecks starts piecing things together that may be connected to both him and Sever.
My Thoughts
After watching I realized the film should have just been called Ballistic instead of Ballistic: Ecks vs. Sever. Now yes Ballistic is a very generic name but...it would have been more honest. I'll explain as we go on.
Okay everyone I want you to pay attention to Sever's introduction here because quite honestly I laughed. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bqFc-dQiPxI. As you just saw why would a couple of armed men want to do hand-to-hand combat with Sever? You have guns just shoot her! There is literally no reasons for them to walk up when they could just fire at will. These are the worst security guards ever.
Then we get to Jeremiah Ecks in a bar. Two agents walk up to him and say they were sent by his former boss Julio Martin. Then after Ecks beats the crap out of them Julio casually walks right up Ecks. So...Julio was in the bar the whole time? Then what was the point of sending the two agents when he was there!? I mean what was the plan? Get the two agents to drag Ecks to him when he was only 5 feet away? I swear this movie is just getting worse with each and every passing scene.
Then we get this piece of dialogue
Jeremiah Ecks: You went to her funeral.
Julio Martin: You saw a closed casket.
Jeremiah Ecks: Where is she?
Julio Martin: .....I don't know.
Jeremiah Ecks: Then why are you?
Julio Martin: I need you to do a job for me.
Jeremiah Ecks: Where is my wife?
Julio Martin: I'm sorry. I need you to...
Jeremiah Ecks: Where is she?
Julio Martin: When the job is done I'll give you what I got.
Now I brought this specific exchange of words because image being Ecks at this point. Your former boss walks up to you one day is like "hey your wife that's been dead for seven years turns out she's alive. Who knew"? Then your boss tells you he doesn't know about where she currently is but if you do this job for him then I'll give you more information of her whereabouts. If first you say you don't know then after I ask a second you tell me do a job then you'll give me more information how am I suppose to trust you at that point?
So it turns out Julio needs Ecks to find Robert Gant's son. Why thought? Their the FBI. You mean to tell me you have nobody else who can to this job? What makes it even worse is not only has Ecks not worked for them for several years but he doesn't have any inside information nor does he know who Sever is. Hell nobody knows who Sever is, so why even bother bring Ecks here anyways?
Then later we're introduced to a new character named Ross aka "The Prince of Darkness". To be honest I just laughed at that moment. Because one I am so willing to believe that's just a name he give to himself and two they said that's his nickname. That's not a nickname a nickname is something short like Mike. Also nothing says generic bad guy like a title called "The Prince of Darkness". And last but not least Ross is the most cardboard cut of evil henchmen ever. He even comes with the most bland dialogue to back up his genericness.
Later on in the film we're told Gant wanted the perfect assassin so he made this tiny robot thing that can kill someone once it's in there bloodstream, then press a button and nobody knows you did it. But this brings up some questions. Like one how do you get it into someone's bloodstream? Remember this is a mechanical bug so the process can't be easy. I mean does someone have to inhale it? Or can you put it into there bloodstream directly? If it's the second option someone's definitely gonna know it was you. It's kind of hard to be sneaky when you have to inject your target with a needle. And another thing if your supposedly going to get away with murder with this machine, doesn't that leave behind a trail? Because you just put of robot in someone's blood. A simply x-ray or maybe even an autopsy will ruin your plans.
Then we cut straight to a mall where Sever, Gant's men, the DIA, and everybody else is there. I mean it when I say we cut straight to that scene. We have no idea how anybody found out that Sever was even at that specific mall. Also we finally see what Ecks' brilliant plan was to find Sever...it was wait in the car and listen to the police scanner. That's not me making a cheap joke folks that's Ecks' plan. Seriously nobody in the freaking FBI thought of this. Then we see a shoot out insure and yet again nobody can take Sever down. We have both Gant's men and the DIA attacking this woman and you mean to tell me nobody can at least give her a flesh wound or a bruise. Writers there's a differences between skilled badass and having really dumb armed forces. Then after Sever comes back to the scene of the crime (no reason is giving, she just randomly comes back) we finally get our big fight between our two stars. Oh boy is it a let down. The fight scene between them is so awkward. The best way to describe is when your rehearsing for a fight scene then the actually fight. What I mean by that is both of our title characters moved very slowly. Also remember when I said the film should have been titled Ballistic instead of Ballistic: Ecks vs. Sever? Well the reason why I said that was because this fight scene is our only fight scene between them. They have no round 2 or anything, because after that fight they meet up later and team up.
Now this film does contain a lot of action but it's not really exciting and I didn't care for it. Mainly because it's all done so horribly. During Ecks and Sever's fight some parts are in really time while others are in slow motion, but the slow-mo shots are unnecessary. But even if this movie did have great action I still wouldn't care because there's not a good story to back it up.
The other problem with this film is the lack of character development. Everyone by the end of the movie more or less is the same as when the film first started. And speaking of character we're told that Sever was an orphan and she was later trained to the ultimate killing machine with no emotions. But yet she wants revenge on Gant because he got her son and husband killed. So she's suppose to be an emotionless killer but yet her motive is based on emotion that being anger. If this doesn't convinced you that the writers have no idea how to write, then I don't know what will. In matter of fact this was the perfect opportunity to have us the audience connect with her but the writers thought "nah let's just breeze past that. Nobody's interested in that. All they want is our really boring action scenes".
Then we later see Ecks meet up with his wife Rayne and absolutely no emotions are shared. I mean they were married and one thought the other was dead for seven years and there's no tearful reunion. Then we're told in a flashback that Rayne, Ecks, and Gant were all friends. Which brings up so many things.
1. If they were friends have come Ecks acted like he had no idea who Gant was? The writers explanation was that he's name use to be Agent Clark. But if he was an agent how come Julio and the rest of the FBI?
2. Even if they didn't know who Gant was they have this whole library of Ross' whereabouts so I can only assume that maybe they had footage or a photo of Gant meeting up with him.
3. If they do have video/photos of Gant why not show them to Ecks? Since Ecks knows him they could have shown his face then Ecks could have been like "Oh my god I know who that man is"!
Later on we're told that Gant staged Rayne's (who at this moment is going by the name Vinn) death by blowing up two cars to I guess kill Ecks and convince Vinn that he was dead. But the question is why did he do it? It's simply really...he wanted to steal Rayne away from Ecks. First off that's incredibly desperate. Second he's big plan to do this was to blow up Ecks' car then blow up a completely different car that has no purpose. So when this happened there was no investigating? Nobody called FBI or anything? It was "well two cars exploded and FBI agent Ecks is alive and we only see him...so everyone else is dead. Including Ecks' wife". Also the truth is going to come out eventually. Then what's going to be he's big plan huh? How is going to explain this? Not to mention it would have been next to impossible to pull this off. I mean Ecks and Rayne were married so there had to be a big group of friends and family who knew each one. I mean if they went to each other's funeral there's going to be an awkward moment. And even if they didn't go to a funeral then there would have been somebody anybody that was close to them and would have been seen either Ecks or Rayne both alive and well.
Anyways I would go into more details but I've had enough of this movie. All I'll say is if I was reviewing films back in 2002 (which would have been impossible since I would have been six years old but still) Ballistic: Ecks vs. Sever would have been my number one worst movie of 2002. The action scenes are boring and awfully done, the characters are bland and clichéd, and the story just seems to be all over the place.
My final rating is Destroy It!
Well that was painful but lucky for me I'll be returning to the Marvel Cinematic Universe with my reviews of Ant-Man and it's sequel Ant-Man and The Wasp. So look out for those.
State of The Project (Jun 14th - Jul 5th)
Jun 14th - A Look Back at The Incredibles (2004)
Jun 16th - Incredibles 2 Review
Jun 21st - Raiders of The Lost Media - Overwatch: First Strike
Jun 23rd - Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom Review
Jul 2nd - Cinematic Disasters - Ballistic: Ecks vs. Sever
Jul 5th - A Look Back at Ant-Man (2015) - This review will go up at 6:00pm (Eastern) and 3:00pm (Pacific). The reason being I'll be seeing an earlier screening of Ant-Man and The Wasp.
NOTE: IF ANYTHING CHANGES I WILL TELL YOU!
Then later we're introduced to a new character named Ross aka "The Prince of Darkness". To be honest I just laughed at that moment. Because one I am so willing to believe that's just a name he give to himself and two they said that's his nickname. That's not a nickname a nickname is something short like Mike. Also nothing says generic bad guy like a title called "The Prince of Darkness". And last but not least Ross is the most cardboard cut of evil henchmen ever. He even comes with the most bland dialogue to back up his genericness.
Later on in the film we're told Gant wanted the perfect assassin so he made this tiny robot thing that can kill someone once it's in there bloodstream, then press a button and nobody knows you did it. But this brings up some questions. Like one how do you get it into someone's bloodstream? Remember this is a mechanical bug so the process can't be easy. I mean does someone have to inhale it? Or can you put it into there bloodstream directly? If it's the second option someone's definitely gonna know it was you. It's kind of hard to be sneaky when you have to inject your target with a needle. And another thing if your supposedly going to get away with murder with this machine, doesn't that leave behind a trail? Because you just put of robot in someone's blood. A simply x-ray or maybe even an autopsy will ruin your plans.
Then we cut straight to a mall where Sever, Gant's men, the DIA, and everybody else is there. I mean it when I say we cut straight to that scene. We have no idea how anybody found out that Sever was even at that specific mall. Also we finally see what Ecks' brilliant plan was to find Sever...it was wait in the car and listen to the police scanner. That's not me making a cheap joke folks that's Ecks' plan. Seriously nobody in the freaking FBI thought of this. Then we see a shoot out insure and yet again nobody can take Sever down. We have both Gant's men and the DIA attacking this woman and you mean to tell me nobody can at least give her a flesh wound or a bruise. Writers there's a differences between skilled badass and having really dumb armed forces. Then after Sever comes back to the scene of the crime (no reason is giving, she just randomly comes back) we finally get our big fight between our two stars. Oh boy is it a let down. The fight scene between them is so awkward. The best way to describe is when your rehearsing for a fight scene then the actually fight. What I mean by that is both of our title characters moved very slowly. Also remember when I said the film should have been titled Ballistic instead of Ballistic: Ecks vs. Sever? Well the reason why I said that was because this fight scene is our only fight scene between them. They have no round 2 or anything, because after that fight they meet up later and team up.
Now this film does contain a lot of action but it's not really exciting and I didn't care for it. Mainly because it's all done so horribly. During Ecks and Sever's fight some parts are in really time while others are in slow motion, but the slow-mo shots are unnecessary. But even if this movie did have great action I still wouldn't care because there's not a good story to back it up.
The other problem with this film is the lack of character development. Everyone by the end of the movie more or less is the same as when the film first started. And speaking of character we're told that Sever was an orphan and she was later trained to the ultimate killing machine with no emotions. But yet she wants revenge on Gant because he got her son and husband killed. So she's suppose to be an emotionless killer but yet her motive is based on emotion that being anger. If this doesn't convinced you that the writers have no idea how to write, then I don't know what will. In matter of fact this was the perfect opportunity to have us the audience connect with her but the writers thought "nah let's just breeze past that. Nobody's interested in that. All they want is our really boring action scenes".
Then we later see Ecks meet up with his wife Rayne and absolutely no emotions are shared. I mean they were married and one thought the other was dead for seven years and there's no tearful reunion. Then we're told in a flashback that Rayne, Ecks, and Gant were all friends. Which brings up so many things.
1. If they were friends have come Ecks acted like he had no idea who Gant was? The writers explanation was that he's name use to be Agent Clark. But if he was an agent how come Julio and the rest of the FBI?
2. Even if they didn't know who Gant was they have this whole library of Ross' whereabouts so I can only assume that maybe they had footage or a photo of Gant meeting up with him.
3. If they do have video/photos of Gant why not show them to Ecks? Since Ecks knows him they could have shown his face then Ecks could have been like "Oh my god I know who that man is"!
Later on we're told that Gant staged Rayne's (who at this moment is going by the name Vinn) death by blowing up two cars to I guess kill Ecks and convince Vinn that he was dead. But the question is why did he do it? It's simply really...he wanted to steal Rayne away from Ecks. First off that's incredibly desperate. Second he's big plan to do this was to blow up Ecks' car then blow up a completely different car that has no purpose. So when this happened there was no investigating? Nobody called FBI or anything? It was "well two cars exploded and FBI agent Ecks is alive and we only see him...so everyone else is dead. Including Ecks' wife". Also the truth is going to come out eventually. Then what's going to be he's big plan huh? How is going to explain this? Not to mention it would have been next to impossible to pull this off. I mean Ecks and Rayne were married so there had to be a big group of friends and family who knew each one. I mean if they went to each other's funeral there's going to be an awkward moment. And even if they didn't go to a funeral then there would have been somebody anybody that was close to them and would have been seen either Ecks or Rayne both alive and well.
Anyways I would go into more details but I've had enough of this movie. All I'll say is if I was reviewing films back in 2002 (which would have been impossible since I would have been six years old but still) Ballistic: Ecks vs. Sever would have been my number one worst movie of 2002. The action scenes are boring and awfully done, the characters are bland and clichéd, and the story just seems to be all over the place.
My final rating is Destroy It!
Well that was painful but lucky for me I'll be returning to the Marvel Cinematic Universe with my reviews of Ant-Man and it's sequel Ant-Man and The Wasp. So look out for those.
State of The Project (Jun 14th - Jul 5th)
Jun 14th - A Look Back at The Incredibles (2004)
Jun 16th - Incredibles 2 Review
Jun 21st - Raiders of The Lost Media - Overwatch: First Strike
Jun 23rd - Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom Review
Jul 2nd - Cinematic Disasters - Ballistic: Ecks vs. Sever
Jul 5th - A Look Back at Ant-Man (2015) - This review will go up at 6:00pm (Eastern) and 3:00pm (Pacific). The reason being I'll be seeing an earlier screening of Ant-Man and The Wasp.
NOTE: IF ANYTHING CHANGES I WILL TELL YOU!
No comments:
Post a Comment