Looking Back at the Films of 2023 Part Ten - Killers of the Flower Moon, Godzilla Minus One, Leo, & Wish

 

Welcome back to yet another edition. Let's get to it.

Why is Killers of the Flower Moon Here?

So if any of you know how this works then you know I put these movies in the month they were released. Well the reason why Killers of the Flower Moon is here instead of in Oct is because I made a mistake. I thought it came in November but then I saw it came out in October. So instead of just canceling a review for it, I decided to move it with the rest of the movies.

Why Didn't I See Killers of the Flower Moon?

Well I was hoping to review this but sadly I couldn't because my local theater wasn't gonna have a showing until much much later. So I wasn't gonna get my chance to review while it was fresh.

What is Killers of the Flower Moon?

Killers of the Flower Moon is an epic western crime drama movie, based on David Grann's 2017 book of the same name. Paramount Pictures and Apple Original Films did distribution, with production being handled to Apple Studios, Imperative Entertainment, Sikelia Productions, and Appian Way Productions. The screenplay was written by Martin Scorsese and Eric Roth with Martin Scorsese also directing.

The story is, it's 1920s Oklahoma and there's been numerous murders of the Osage natives. Theses series of murders of attracted the attention of the FBI. As they investigate, they go down a spiral of greed.

My Thoughts

The Good: Let's start off with the performances. Mainly from Robert De Niro, Leonardo Dicaprio, and Lily Gladstone. Robert was perfect at playing with the role of William King Hale. He nailed it as this guy who was truly a wolf in sheep's clothing. Dicaprio is supposed to be this very conflicted man even though it's very clear he's a bad guy. And Lily was outstanding as Mollie. Her role is this woman who is blinded by love, and Lily really makes you feel sympathetic towards Mollie. Then there's Scorsese's directing. The guy is in his 80's and he still hasn't missed a beat when being behind the camera. He made a beautifully dark looking film. The last thing I'll praise is the story. Now we still do get a brilliantly told crime story. It's a sad story cause even though the ones responsible were caught, sadly many people died and the story, the real one, was lost to history for the longest time. But Martin also said how it's a love story, and it is in a sense. However it's not feel good romantic, it's tragic. Because like I said people are so blinded by love that they can't see what's right in front of them.

The Bad: The only downside was the runtime. This movie is three hours long and it feels like it. I started to feel that long runtime within an hour into the movie.

The Okay: None.

Final Verdict: Great!

Why Didn't I See Godzilla Minus One?

Well my theater did have a showing when the movie made it's debut in the states, but I was so busy with other stuff in my life that sadly Godzilla had to take a backseat...oh well. Sometimes that's life for ya.

What is Godzilla Minus One?

Godzilla Minus One is an epic kaiju movie, being the 37th film in the franchise, the 33rd Toho Godzilla movie, and the fifth installment to the Reiwa era. Toho Studios and Robot Communications produced while Toho distributed. The film was written and directed by Takashi Yamazaki.

The story is, it's postwar Japan a former kamikaze pilot is suffering from PTSD from not just the war but from a giant terrifying monster. Very soon, all of Japan will share his fear when Godzilla rises and brings havoc to the nation.

My Thoughts

The Good: Oh I got a lot of positive things to say, starting with the directing. I'm gonna be honest I've never seen any of Yamazaki's previous work, but I will say he did a fantastic job here. He shot a beautifully made movie, I loved the whole look and everything. Then we have the performances. Now naturally I had to watch this with subtitles cause I can't speak Japanese even if my life depended on it, but even if I had to watch with subtitles that didn't change the fact I could see the fantastic job done by the actors. They bring it. Whether it'd be the tone of their voice, facial expressions and body language, they were tremendous. Which now brings me to the special effects. Wow...just...wow. This was made with an estimated budget of $10-15 million and yet somehow looks better than some movies with a budget $200 million. Really spent that money wisely. Then there's the pacing. It clocks in a two hours and eighteen minutes but didn't feel that way. Even the more character focused moments just go right by while still giving us the info and drama we needed. The last thing I'll praise is the story. While Godzilla still plays a big role in the story, this is still very much a human story. Not only are some of our characters struggle with PTSD, but those who don't have post-traumatic stress still have to live with trying to rebuild their lives after the bomb wrecked everything. Then just when they thought some form of normalcy was on the horizon, Godzilla appears destroying that hope. You really feel for the human characters and are hoping none them get hurt or worse die. If any of you know me then you're well aware that I like the MonsterVerse and that franchise being popcorn flicks, but if I can get a Godzilla movie that's one half monster flick, another half human struggles, then I'm all for it.

The Bad: There's nothing wrong.

The Okay: Got nothing here either.

Final Verdict: A MUST WATCH!

Why Did I See Leo?

Mainly because ever since COVID ended years back I've been moving further and further away from streaming movies unless it truly interests me. Like say the director's cuts of the Rebel Moon movies and Mr. Crocket. And there was the fact Adam Sandler is starring. Don't get the wrong idea, he's done a lot of good stuff, but there's also been tons of crap.

What is Leo?

Leo is an animated musical comedy, that's produced by Netflix Animation, Happy Madison Productions, Animal Logic, and Screen NSW, with Netflix distributing. The story was written by Adam Sandler, Robert Smigel, and Paul Sado with directing done by Robert Marianetti, David Wachtenheim, and Robert Smigel.

The story is, Leo is a jaded 74 year old lizard who's been in the same classroom for decades. When he finds out he's only got one more year left to live, he sets out to experience life outside the classroom. But he'll need to deal with some anxious students and one mean substitute teacher.

My Thoughts

The Good: One aspect is the cast primarily Adam Sandler and Bill Burr. I liked both of them, I thought they were really entertaining and made their characters more likable. Although I'll admit that the voice that Sandler uses for Leo does take time to get use to. Speaking of Leo, he's a really good guy...or lizard I should say. While he does start off being selfish in his goal, he slowly starts to realize he's life can be helping the kids in his classroom before his time is up. So he does quickly become a very likable character. Then there's the pacing. While not as long as the movie above I just previously reviewed, it's pretty nice how this heartwarming story was told as good as it was even though it goes by very quickly. Alright now for the humor. Let me just say, no not ever joke worked, mainly the pee and poop ones. But I did enjoy all of the other jokes. My favorite one is this running gag where the kindergartens are just a bunch of animals. Because I can so see that as how adults saw me and my classmates. Just this group of uncontrollable little savages. The last thing I'll credit is the story. While not something that's gonna break the mold of storytelling, it's actually pretty good. It's clear there was some heart put into but, a lot of times it can be relatable. You can understand that part of your childhood where you're taking that next step in life like moving up to another grade, thinking you're too talkative, thinking you have to be something special because your parents went on and on about how special you are because of wealth or something else, and having to deal with helicopter parents. Very understandable stuff.

The Bad: I've got nothing.

The Okay: The decent part of the movie comes from the animation. It's solid. It's not mind blowing awesome but it's by no means bad, far from it. The animation is serviceable.

Final Verdict: Good.

Why Didn't I See Wish?

Simply put the movie just didn't interest me. There was nothing in the marketing that made feel like I absolutely NEED to see this. So instead of just forcing myself to see it just for the sake of this blog, I just decided to save it for this segment.

What is Wish?

Wish is an animated musical fantasy drama movie. Production was done by Walt Disney Animation Studios while Walt Disney Studios Motion Pictures was in charge of distribution. The movie was written by Jennifer Lee and Allison Moore and Chris Buck and Fawn Veerasunthorn directed.

The story is, in the land of Rosas a powerful sorcerer named King Magnifico can grant wishes. A young woman named Asha ask him to grant wish for someone special to her, and declines. Finding out he's not what he seems, Asha wants to put a stop to his controlling ways.

My Thoughts

The Good: The cast is good...too bad they weren't given better material.

The Bad: Oh boy, I've got a lot to say. First off let's start with the animation. It's not very good. The filmmakers though it'd be a good idea to combine traditional animation with 3D animation. Now that by no means is a bad idea, it's been done before and very successfully. But the hell was this style? Yeah it's 2D and 3D put together but it's not a good look. It looks like it was half way close to being finished. Then there's our hero Asha and the villain Magnifico. The writing for these two was bad. Let's start off with Asha. Not only is she yet another "adorkable" character that Disney seems to be really obsessed with as of late, but her idea is horrible. She doesn't like the fact that not everybody is getting their wish granted. So she thinks it'd be a good idea to grant everybody's wishes. Never mind the fact that's an absolutely terrible idea! Oh and she decided to get to that goal by inciting dissent threw out the kingdom and overthrow the king. Now yes there's some good rebellions that did the same thing, but because Asha is so entitled this makes her look like the villain. Speaking of "villain" boy did I feel bad for Magnifico. They want us to consider him a villain because he's not granting every single wish. Which doesn't make sense. There are some bad wishes that could negatively effect not only the person who wanted the wish, but also effect other people. And what's actually pretty noble is he doesn't disregard the unmade wishes, he keeps them safe. The only reason he went crazy afterwards was because thanks to Asha, the villagers got very greedy and ungrateful. Alright let's move onto the music. A lot of these songs aren't very good. Okay some are fine, others not so much. Let's start with Magnifico's "villain" song.

First off, the ego parts don't make any sense because he didn't act that way until this song. Also this is WAY too upbeat for a villain song. When you listen to classic Disney villain songs they're usually very dark and sinister, like the villain is enjoying being evil. Sure Magnifico's song gets a little dark in the middle but that lasted what? Twenty seconds? Lastly, "I let you live here for free and I don't even charge you rent". That's the same exact thing. Now onto our "hero" song.

This sounds way more like a villain song even though it's supposed to be the big the rebels are banding together. Also ironic how one piece of this song is about how Magnifico is a liar when Asha is kinda lying about who he is.

The last thing I'll criticize and it's my biggest problem is how the movie doesn't do anything special. Why is that my biggest complaint? Because last year this movie was meant to celebrate the 100th anniversary of Disney. The 100th anniversary of one of the most iconic brands in not only American history, but history in general, and we got a bland, uninspiring, and terribly written movie. What a shame.

The Okay: I've got nothing.

Final Verdict: Awful!

Okay finally finished with that. Come back on Saturday, Dec 7th, for my review of the newest Amy Adams' movie, Nightbitch. Although my theater doesn't seem like it'll have a showing for that. So if there's no review for that then come back on Monday, Dec 9th, for my Classic Film Night review of Home Alone. Until then, enjoy the rest of your day.

Watchmen: Chapter II Review

 

Watchmen: Chapter II is a comic book movie, the sequel to Watchmen: Chapter I, and adapts the second half of the comic maxiseries. It's produced by DC Entertainment, Paramount Pictures, and Warner Bros. Animation, with distribution done by Warner Bros. Entertainment Inc. J. Michael Straczynski returned to write and Brandon Vietti also returned to direct.

The story is, at first nobody believed Rorschach's theory that somebody is killing heroes because something diabolical is at play. But now after Nite Owl and Silk Spectre have put the pieces together they believe him. The heroes plan to stop whoever is responsible, but they might be too late.

Initial Reaction

Okay I don't think you need to think real hard as to why as I wanted to review this. I saw part one, so it only makes sense to review the second half.

Cons

I've got nothing.

Middle Ground

Let's start off small with the animation. It still captures Dave Gibbon's art fairly well. It does a pretty good job with the smaller moments such as when the characters just talking and such. However the action leaves a lot to be desired. Whenever there's a fight scene the characters just move a little too slow. Then there's the story. There was some additional material put into it, but for the most part they story's the same as the comic. But because of that my issues with the graphic novel are also here in this story. For instance, The Black Freighter story still spells out the villain's decent into madness, only it's made worse here because they intersplice it with the villain doing his evil deed. So if you felt the comic questioned your intelligence with The Black Freighter, get ready to feel it with this movie.

Pros

I'm gonna keep this brief because my praise will be very similar to my review to Chapter I but with one difference. Let's get into the familiarity portion, that being the voice acting. The cast for Nite Owl, Silk Spectre, and Dr. Manhattan still did a tremendous job. I thought their voices still fit their characters. Then there's the pacing. With Chapter I it was a bit slow in some areas. This isn't the case for Chapter II. This one kept the pacing very steady. Not once did things feel slow.

While still not perfect if you liked Chapter I then I think you'll like Chapter II.

My final rating is, Good.

Alright that was probably my quickest review yet. Come back on Saturday, Nov 30th, for part ten of Looking Back at the Films of 2023. For those I'll be reviewing Killers of the Flower Moon, Godzilla Minus One, Leo, and Wish.

Yes I'm doing that segment on Saturday. It would've been today but Watchmen: Chapter II releasing this month threw me for a loop. So it's happening on Saturday. Anyhow, until then enjoy the rest of your day. Oh, and I hope you all have or had a Happy Thanksgiving.

Road to Superman (2025) - Superman IV: The Quest for Peace Review

 

Damn, just...damn. I tried for as long as possible to delay having to review this, but sadly the time has come. Here we are on the next part of the Road to Superman (2025), and it's undoubtedly the worst part.

Superman IV: The Quest for Peace is a comic book movie and the final installment of the original Superman film series. The Cannon Group Inc. and Golan-Globus Productions worked on the movie with Warner Bros. yet again distributing. The story was written by Lawrence Konner, Mark Rosenthal, and shockingly enough Christopher Reeve, with Sidney J. Furie directing.

The story is, after hearing that the U.S. and the Soviet Union may engage in a nuclear arms race, Superman decides to step in and put a stop to it. However a lot of black market arms dealers aren't happy this but Lex Luthor says he has a plan to not only put a stop to it, but also has something or someone that can kill The Man of Tomorrow for good.

• Negatives

Oh boy, unsurprisingly there's a lot of negative things to say about Superman IV. Like for instance, the special effects. Oh sweet baby Jesus, these effects! They're awful. The blue screen is the worst it's ever been. If you weren't impressed with blue screen from the previous movies, you're not gonna like what you see from this. And if that's not bad enough, when they don't have a special effect to use, they'll just obviously re-use previous shots. More specifically, this shot of Superman flying into the camera 👇.

I counted, they use that shot six times. Although with this level of cheapness we really shouldn't be too surprised. During this time Cannon was slashing the budget to this because of their financial crisis. Which begs the question, why did Warner Bros. continue working with Cannon? They had to have known about the production and all of its problems. You're making a Superman movie, you can't cheap out on the budget! Especially when you've got a multitude of flying and fight scenes!

Now let's move onto the villains. First off Lex Luthor, who yet again wants to kill Superman. Basically it's the same shit but different day with him. I get it, Luthor is Superman's main rival. But he was used twice already. There's other villains they could've used that debuted prior to the first Reeve film. Villains like Atomic Skull, Intergang, Metallo, or Parasite. And if an overly re-used bad guy wasn't enough, we've got Nuclear Man. 1) He might as well just be Bizarro what with the whole Lex cloning Superman thing. 2) He's got the worst weakness ever. What it is? Shade...I kid you not. Just get him in the shade and then even you, a simple no superpowered human can easily kick his ass. It's that simple.

The last thing I'll criticize is the story. Holy hell the story! It's just all over the place. First it's about a race to nuclear warfare and how nukes are bad, then it's finished...I think? Then Superman makes a speech about how it'll go away, even though that hasn't been a critical plot point for a majority of the movie. Then there's multiple subplots. Like the Kent farm being sold. It's a one and done scene so what was the point? The Daily Planet is being bought and sold. It's brought up, never talked about again, and isn't brought back until the very end of the movie. Then there's a love triangle among Clark, Lois, and Lacy (the daughter of the guy who bought the Daily Planet). It's so forgettable I had to constantly remind myself it was a thing when writing this review. Not to mention but there's always inconsistencies. The biggest example is at one moment you have to wear a space suit when in space, makes sense. But when Lacy is kidnapped by Nuclear Man and taken into space with no space suit at all, she's perfectly fine! I guess she's half Kyptonian or something? So yeah...it's just a mess of a story.

• Mix

I've got absolutely nothing...just move on.

• Positives

Christopher Reeve's performance. He's the only saving grace.

I hate Superman IV: The Quest for Peace and I'll always hate it.

My final rating is, Awful!

Thankfully this'll be the last time I ever have to talk about it. That's all for now. Come back on Thursday, Nov 28th, for my review of the newest animated DC movie, Watchmen: Chapter II. Until then, enjoy the rest of your day.

Gladiator II Review

 

Gladiator II is an epic historical action movie and the sequel to Gladiator. Scott Free Productions and Lucy Fisher/Douglas Wick Productions produced while Paramount Pictures disturbed. The film is written David Scarpa and Peter Craig, while Ridley Scott returned to direct.

The story is, sixteen years have gone by since the death of Maximus, in those years Rome as been ruled by corrupted twins. They've sent armies to conquer lands they desire, during these invasions Lucius' wife is killed. He now seeks revenge for the General who lead the army, but he'll soon discover something bigger is at play.

Initial Reaction

At first I didn't want to see this. Mainly because I thought there was no reason for Gladiator. Then the first trailer came out and I decided to give it a chance. Although the choice of music for that trailer really sucked.

Cons

Nothing here folks, just move onto the next part.

Middle Ground

There's two gray areas with the movie. One of those being the pacing. With the first movie it was things felt slower than they should be, with this one there's instances where things are going almost at a break neck speed. To the point where some parts almost flip on a dime. How much you wanna bet this is a Kingdom of Heaven and Napoleon situation where there's a director's cut and it's better? Jokes aside, the other mix bag was our villains. Now the stuff with Macrinus (played by Denzel Washington) is really good. I loved what they did with him. The twins Emperor Geta and Caracalla was okay. I loved seeing both of them go full blown psychotic, but what we really needed to see even if it was a small detail was their rise to power. It worked for Commodus, maybe it would've worked for them?

Pros

Now let's get into the good stuff, like the performances. While the sequel material isn't as strong as the 2000 film, that didn't stop the cast from giving out some very strong acting. I thought they did great. Especially the likes of Denzel Washington, Pedro Pascal, etc. Then there's the story. While I still have grips with it I still enjoyed. Mainly cause this one did have a political thriller chess game to it. The last thing I'll credit is the action. I still lean more towards the first, but the action for Gladiator II did have some excitement to it. Especially during the last half of the movie. I'd go into more detail but it's very spoiler heavy and you know I don't do spoilers unless I find it to be something stupid and I don't want you to waste your time.

While not as strong as its predecessor, there's still somethings to like about the sequel.

My final rating is, Good.

That's all for me. Come back on Monday, Nov 25th where I'll return to the Road to Superman (2025) with my review of...ugh, Superman IV: The Quest for Peace. Until then, enjoy the rest of your day.

Raiders of The Lost Media - Nick Cave's Gladiator II

 

Man, it's been a whole year since I've done any of these. Thankfully I've found the time to do this and even better, got a great subject. Which is the original or as it's sometimes called Nick Cave's Gladiator II. Let's get into it.

Part One - Who is Nick Cave?

Originally I was going to tell you what's Gladiator II, but not only would that even been self-explanatory but I was going to go into detail about the movie in the next part. So instead let me tell you who Nick Cave is.

Nick Cave is an Australian musician, more specifically he's the frontman for Nick Cave and the Bad Seeds. Now I've never heard any song from this band so I can't give my opinions of his work. But when he's not writing music he's also done some film work primarily writing movies. One movie being 2005's The Proposition, which would go on to get good reviews.

Part Two - The Story of Gladiator II

Now I'm only gonna give you a brief idea, mainly because it's one of those things where it's best to read the full story all by yourself.

So here's how the story goes, Maximus has awakened in the afterlife but not the only he dreamed of. In order to get what he wants, Jupiter makes a deal with him to go and kill Hephaestus because he believes he's betraying them and is now preaching the gospel of another god who supposedly more powerful than them. Maximus agrees, then he's sent back to world of the living a decade or two after his death.

Part Three - Cancelation

So why exactly didn't the movie get made? Well it's a very simple answer really. After reading it Russel Crowe didn't like it. He simply told Nick, "Don't like it, mate". Now having written this, how did Nick take it? Well he actually didn't mind. During an interview with denofgeek.com, he would say, "I enjoyed writing it very much because I knew on every level that it was never going to get made".

And in all honesty, I'm actually glad this didn't happen. Not because I don't think the movie doesn't deserve to be made, but because it's not Gladiator. The first movie didn't have this whole supernatural aspect to it. Sure Maximus had that vision of his dead wife and son in the afterlife, but that wasn't something supernatural, that was all in his head. But I say if by any chance this does get made into a movie, they need to write out all of the Maximus parts and just make it it's own thing. That way it's an original story as suppose to being a weird sequel to a beloved classic.

So yeah, that's all I've got sorry if this is so short, but like I said previously it's a script you should read for yourself, because there's crazy stuff in there I didn't want to spoil for you. So if your curious, here's a link.

Anyhow, that's going to do it for me. Come back on Saturday, Nov 23rd, for my review of well, Gladiator II. Until then, enjoy the rest of your day.

A Look Back at Gladiator (2000)

 

With the sequel on the way it's time to look back at the first movie.

Gladiator is a historical epic, that was produced by DreamWorks Pictures, Universal Pictures, Scott Free Productions, and Red Wagon Productions and distributed by DreamWorks Distribution. It's written by David Franzoni, John Logan, and William Nicholson and directed by one of my many favorites, Ridley Scott.

The story is, Roman general Maximus has lead a successful victory, but when he's demanded loyalty to the self-proclaimed new emperor Commodus, he refuses. His punishment is the death of his beloved wife and son. Now reduced to being a slave and fighting as a gladiator, Maximus now plans to work through the ranks and get his revenge.

• Negatives

I've got nothing.

• Mix

Now despite how much I love this movie, there is one tiny but forgivable issue, the pacing. Yeah even though the movie is overall awesome, it does drag in some areas.

• Positives

Alright now to the good stuff. One of those being Ridley Scott's directing. Like I said before, he's one of my faves and no matter the genre or quality of the movie, Ridley always delivers when it comes to the look of his films. And Gladiator is no different. It looks gorgeous.

In all honesty, I don't know what I can say about Russell Crowe's performance that hasn't already been said. He delivered and earned his Best Actor award, and I think that's all that needs to be said.

Since this is an epic, how's the action? Well folks the action is pretty sweet. I loved it. Whenever it's go time I go so excited. The action is thrilling and can be very brutal.

Now to move onto the dialogue. Yes we've got the "Are you not entertained?", but there are also other great bits of dialogue like, "At my signal, unleash Hell". But my personal favorite is "I knew a man who once said, Death smiles at us all. All a man can do is smile back."

The last thing I'll praise is our main villain, Commodus. If you plan to watch this just before the sequel comes out, be prepared to absolutely hate this guy. Sure he's creepy and ruthless, but he's also such a childish and cowardly little weasel you're just waiting in anticipation for Maximus to beat the hell out of him. Seriously, you're gonna love to hate this guy.

Gladiator was a tremendously great film back in 2000 and it's a tremendously great film now. It's strongly recommended for you to see this. Yes, I did mention some pacing, but it's forgivable.

My final rating is, A MUST WATCH!

Boy that was fun. Come back on Thursday, Nov 21st, for a brand new Raiders of The Lost Media (yes I still do those), with that one I'll be going over the original idea for Gladiator II. And oh boy is it a crazy one. Until then, enjoy the rest of your day.

Red One Review

 

Red One is a Christmas action comedy fantasy movie. Production was done by Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer Pictures, Seven Bucks Productions, Chris Morgan Productions, and The Detective Agency, with Amazon MGM Studios being the distributor. The movie is written by Chris Morgan and directed by Jake Kasdan.

The story is, Santa Claus has been kidnapped! Now his head of security Callum Drift is on a mission to find him, but the only person who can help is hacker Jack O'Malley. As they continue their search they soon discover there's something bigger at play.

Initial Reaction

Now in full honesty I was fully pumped for this movie, didn't even make it on my most anticipated list. I went to see this strictly out of curiosity and maybe get some decent or good material out of it for a review.

Cons

I've got nothing.

Middle Ground

There's three slight issues. One, the CGI. Sometimes it looked pretty good, nothing mind blowing but still good, other times, no. It wasn't good. Then there's the pacing. Most of the times the ball's move just fine, nothing to complain about. But there are scenes were you almost get the feeling of the long runtime. Then lastly there's the dialogue. It's either just okay nothing to get bent of shape over or it's predictable. You know exactly what someone's gonna say before they say it. That aspect really needed more polishing. And because of this slightly unpolished dialogue, sadly some parts of the acting isn't good, although that could also be blamed on directing but I think you get the point.

Pros

Now there are some good things from Red One, at least from my perspective. One being the humor. Somethings didn't work, but nine times out of ten I was having a good time. Second is the take on Santa and how he operates. I really dug it and it was also pretty funny too. It was like Santa and his elves were a spy or black ops team, only you know, much more wholesome.

Now I didn't hate this movie like everybody else does but, I do believe you don't have to rush to see this. It would be best to sit and wait for this whether as a rental or something to stream.

My final rating is, Okay.

Well this was probably one of the more easier movies for me to review. Anyways, come back on Monday, Nov 18th, for my A Look Back at review of, Gladiator. Until then, enjoy the rest of your day.

Road to Karate Kid: Legends - The Karate Kid (1984) Review

 

That's right, got yet another Road to, only instead of superheroes it's all about karate. Where as per usual I'm doing it cause of the newest Karate Kid movie coming out next year. So let's get to it.

The Karate Kid is marital arts drama movie, where not only is it the first movie of the franchise, but for a fun fact also popularized karate in the U.S. Delphi II Productions and Jerry Weintraub Productions handled producing, while Columbia Pictures was in charged of distribution. The film was written by Robert Mark Kamen and directing was done by John G. Avildsen.

The story is, along with his mother, Daniel LaRusso was moved from New Jersey to Los Angeles. At first, Daniel gets new to the new environment and is living peacefully. This changes when known bully Johnny and his buddies use their karate skills to beat up Daniel. Being feed up with the bullying, Daniel wants to learn karate from Mr. Miyagi.

• Negatives

I've got nothing.

• Mix

The gray area is the music. A lot of the pop songs while fun, do make the movie slightly outdated. However, I'm not gonna diss "You're The Best". If you don't feel like delivering a good crane kick after hearing, then there's something wrong with you. There's also Bill Conti's score. It has a nice blend of west and east music, while also being very heartfelt. It's some of his best work.

• Positives

One point of praise goes to Ralph Macchio & Pat Morita's performances. Ralph captures Daniel perfectly. He brought out the character's nice side, while also showing the chip on Daniel's shoulder. Then there's Pat Morita. He was amazing. When Miyagi is talking about the tragedy that happened in his past, Pat delivers. Delivers so much the Academy agreed because they nominated him for Best Supporting Actor. And to think, Morita almost didn't get the role because of his comedy background. Thankfully they didn't pass up on him.

Then there's our villain, Kreese! Oh, did you think I was gonna say Johnny? Don't get it twisted, Johnny still did some bad things, but Kreese is way worse. He encourages all of the bad behavior, and also tells his students to purposely injury both Daniel and other competitors. So yeah Kreese, a great villain you'll love to hate.

Now for my biggest praise, that being the story. So many great aspects about it, starting with the karate side. It tells us about the philosophy of karate, and also shows us both the good and bad of the marital art, mainly demonstrating the way Miyagi and Kreese go about their teachings. Speaking of Miyagi, there's a good father and son story with him and Daniel. It's properly built up too. First they're totally strangers, then teacher and student, and so forth. That story is truly the heart and soul of the movie. Then there's the bullying storyline. What makes it great is you can relate. Karate or not, you can relate to being bullied and getting to the point where enough is enough and you start defending yourself. And who knows maybe one thing or the other happened. Your bullies stopped picking on you, or in Daniel's case you earned their respect.

Despite the slight criticism, I love The Karate Kid. It's not only an essential 80's movie to watch, but an essential movie in general to watch.

My final rating is, Great.

That's going to do it for me. Due come back on Saturday, Nov 16th, for my review of Red One. Until then, enjoy the rest of your day.

Cinematic Disasters - Showgirls

 

Alright a brand new Cinematic Disasters! Let's do this!

Showgirls is an "erotic" (and you'll find soon enough why I used quotation marks) drama movie that's produced by Carolco Pictures, Chargeurs, and United Artists with distribution by MGM/UA Distribution Co. Showgirls was written by Joe Eszterhas, with Paul Verhoeven directing.

The story is, a female drifter is heading to Las Vegas to go after her dreams of being a professional dancer and showgirl. But as success comes her way, she sees the darker side of her dreams.

My Thoughts

Let's start off with our main character, Nomi.

1) What kind of a name is that? Sure it's not her real name, but as far as fake names go, that's probably top ten worst.

2) What is this character? Throughout the movie people just like Nomi. In various degrees too. They either want to befriend her, promote her, f*ck her, or some sort of combination. Which I don't get because she's a horrible person. She's got some serious anger issues, inconsiderate of others, or she does horrible things like deliberately injury people to get ahead. And when she's not those things, she's just an idiot.

Now let's talk about the actress behind the Nomi character, Elizabeth Berkley. Her performance is amazingly over the top. I mean it, it's hilarious. But funny enough, she's not to blame for her acting. Paul Verhoeven took full blame. He said and I quote, "I asked Elizabeth to do all that -- to be abrupt and to act in that way, but people have been attacking her about that ever since. If somebody has to be blamed, it should be me". Gotta give him credit, not many directors own up to their mistakes. So yeah folks, go blame Paul.

Now to get into the plot. After wowing the audience, Nomi is offered a job at 'Goddess'. Which is funny, because Nomi can't dance! I mean, just look at this gif.

Although to be fair it's not just Nomi, nobody in this movie can dance! You would think that when you're making a movie that involves a lot of dancing you would make sure the dancing is perfect. I should be making fun of the choreographer, but come on, his or her name is attached to Showgirls. I think that's enough punishment.

Oh and somewhere during this movie Nomi is now addicted to drugs. I bring it up because through a good portion of the runtime, she goes on and on about how drugs are bad and how she doesn't do drugs, and all of the sudden she's into a drugs. It comes right of nowhere with absolutely no build up. It just happens.

Then afterwards we're introduced to James and James is...James is......I don't know who James is. He just comes into the picture, disappears for awhile, then he's back. Come to think of it, that's a running thing in this movie. Characters and subplots are introduced, on screen for a bit, and then they're gone. One of which involves monkeys. I'd go into more detail but I can't, the movie doesn't explain, so neither can I.

This line.

Well there you have it folks. Everybody got aids and shit. 😂

Now at the very beginning I made a smart remark about this being an "erotic" drama. The reason for the quotation marks is because this has got to be the least sexiest movie I've ever seen. To draw you a picture, imagine Elizabeth Berkley having sex, but instead of something sensual, it looks more like she's flopping around like a fish out of water, all the while the guy looks like he's rubbing his stomach against her cooch, as suppose to properly being inside her....if my description sounds even slightly funny to you, go watch the scenes themselves. Trust me, you and your girlfriend are gonna be more in a laughing mood then a horny one. What's even funnier than this is Joe Eszterhas and Paul Verhoever made Basic Instinct! A movie that was labeled "perhaps the quintessential erotic thriller of the 90s". So how in the blue hell did they make one of the best erotic movies, to what some might argue is one of the worst?

Let's move forward to the dialogue, it's weird. Women are either talking about sex, which I am not against a matter of fact, hell yeah! Then when it's not sex, they talk their nails, food, or make sexist jokes about women. Now despite what the woke police will tell you, that's not a bad thing. Hell, us guys make jokes about ourselves all the time. But with this movie the ladies are just brutal, and not in hilarious way, more like of "damn take it easy" way.

I don't recall when, but somewhere, we're introduced to Cristal and she's a big deal for some odd reason. No seriously, when she's in the starring role for Goddess, there is numerous reporters getting interviews with her. They even mentioned how she beat out major stars like Janet Jackson. I'm making a big deal out of this because there's no reason for the movie to make a big deal out of it. It's strippers putting on a show! Had this taken place in an age where stripping was starting out then I'd get it, but this is the mid-90's, I'm pretty sure these kinds of shows were a very common thing. Oh, and going back to Cristal's bizarre status, when she's injured, which is caused by Nomi pushing her down a flight of stairs. Once again, Nomi is terrible woman, her injury and being unable to perform is treated as a major conflict. The guys are absolutely shocked and terrified because now they have to use the understudy [Nomi]. This doesn't make sense because this is why you have an understudy. In case your star can't perform for one reason or the other. Does the movie want us to believe this kind of thing has never happened before?

Moving on, Nomi being the star wows the crowd despite terrible dancing. Soon, her and her friend Molly (a character Nomi befriended at the beginning) go to a party in celebration of the show being a success. Where Molly meets and is head over heels for her musician idol Andrew Carver. Afterwards Carver brings her to his room, where he proceeds to sexual assault her. Now I'm not gonna be up in arms about the sexual assault story. That kind of storytelling has been used multiple times and can be used effectively, what I will say is it doesn't make any sense. They had Molly so consumed with desire for Carver, that you would have thought she just do him anywhere if he asked.

Afterwards, Nomi is naturally pissed about what happened so she of course wants revenge. So she meets up with him back at his place, where she's now a taekwondo expert! No seriously, she just starts spin kicking him like it's going out of style. It's freakin' hilarious.

And so our movie ends with Nomi leaving Vegas and Molly, yeah Nomi doesn't even bother to stay with her during her recovery, she's a nice friend like that. And she also faces no consequences for injuring Cristal, The End.

While the assault scene will make you uneasy, everything else about Showgirls is amazing. If you're a fan of movies that are so bad they're good, Showgirls is an essential.

My final rating is, So Bad, It's Good.

That's going to do it for me. Come back on Thursday, Nov 14th, where I'll begin the Road to Karate Kid: Legends with my review of the original 1984 classic, The Karate Kid. Until then, enjoy the rest of your day and remember, everybody got aids and shit.